Being the observer

The older I get the more I learn. Circumstances and situations really change in a blink of an eye. The situation could be yourself, someone else or an attachment to something. But whatever it is, it's not stable. I figure things change when the time is right. The Universe will mold itself around you so you go where you are supposed to go rather than where you think you should be going. 

I'm grateful for all things that have been presented to me and all the opportunities I've gotten. I know more are to come and I welcome all of it. I've now learned to trust in the way things work. There is so much available for you than what you can only imagine in your mind. The reality we create for ourselves can be so limiting sometimes. When the door swings open, walk through. 

Everything is temporary

I was thinking to myself just now about how things are temporary.  Our moments are, inspirations, our friends and parents but most importantly even we are temporary. We all know we will die one day but it never feels that way. But we really aren't here to stay. It seems so ridiculous to live life by repeatedly infecting ourselves with negative thoughts. When I think how we are temporary and every day and moment is really just an extended minute or a day we get in this lifetime I really don't want to spend it with any negativity. That is something I will remind myself always whenever I allow things in life to get me down. I will think this minute is a gift. It's not a privilege. I shouldn't waste it as many did not get this one minute like I did. 

There have been so many deaths in my circle lately that these thoughts repeat themselves in my mind. I want to take a lesson away from the pain of losing people in our lives. Those who are still here, cherish them. While we are still here, enjoy the life you have. Never take anyone you love for granted. Even when you feel too exhausted or tired to care, you won't regret reaching out one more time. Let go of things that hold you back. Let your eyes experience the things that break your mind open. Make everyday count even if you have nothing to do that day. Every day is a choice my love. 

Favourite quotes of the week!

Summer time

I love summer time. We had the hottest summer ever in Vancouver. In fact, it was so hot I refused to leave the house if i didn't have to for about 2 weeks. 

Just some updates. This year was pretty interesting. I had a very fruitful early winter. Going into spring there were many weddings to attend and many friends to see. I went to Kelowna for a wedding too and it was nice to leave the city for a bit. I also put a down payment on a condo so my life style has changed a bit. 

There have been some additions and substractions in my personal life. Things always keep changing. Never know what's around the corner. That's a good thing though. Things only change to teach you. Things are only removed so you can grow. You only obtain the things that belong to you to begin with. Yet nothing will ever stay the same. 

I did end up going to the 8.5 day meditation retreat. I think it has really changed me. I continue to attend group meditations and events there. I keep experiencing things I can't explain. It's an exciting journey. Everything in life happens for a reason. Just don't question life. It's working for you as long as you slow down for a moment and listen to it whisper to you. In every moment we get a choice. We can choose consciously or blindly. Either way we keep getting what we ask for whether be feel that way or not. 

I am always feeling grateful now. So grateful. Try giving thanks everyday. Most of us have everything we need. We don't have to make life so complicated and so disatisfying. Do you complain more than you cherish? Is there always something that you think is wrong with your life? I try and spend my time thinking of all the things right with my world. I try not to be attached to outcomes and be open to changes in life. I also try to not expect anything from others. I let go of the control a little bit and you know what? It feels pretty good. At the end of the day you can look back at your life and think of everything that you don't like about it or you can just look at right now and think of how to make it better. Now. 

Peace and love. 

Thrifting... My love and obsession

I have a new obsession. Well... Not new. I've been thrifting for kitchenware and knick knacks for many years now but i usually zone in on a particular type of collectible at a time. Once upon a time it was antique tea ware. It took me years to collect enough beautiful teacups to the point that I can't imagine any other addition making much of a difference. So now I'm onto to vintage milk glass. This includes mainly Pyrex but I do collect random milk glass kitchen pieces from  other manufacturers. I also collect milk glass vases. I really do love and cherish each piece I have. I also love the history behind it all. I love the how vintage items have lived past their prime and are still in tip top condition. I also love the craftsmanship and thought put into the pieces. They are not your ordinary white porcelain or glass bowl or plate. There was some love out into those dishes. 

Today's post is a special post on thrifting strAnge I sometimes encounter. There are so many odd and sometimes ugly things found at the thrift store. Things thT make you question why anyone would buy it or why the store decided to sell it at a price that didn't seem reasonable. 

I love finding the thrift stranges. Here are some. 

Ugly trivets... It's rare to see a trivet but today I spotted two. This one was particularly ugly. I'm sure it was of some past contemporary design where everyone had metal flower decals on cups, plates, wine glasss... 

The second strange trivet spotted...

Cast iron dog trivet. Craiglist add placement: must love dogs lol. So unusual for a kitchen piece 

Creepy figurines are another thing common to thrifting. Today I gather a collection of creepy figurines for a horrifying display. 

Stand cats with feather head dresses. Two figurines with bleeding black eyes. Creepy clown and creepy old lady. How long has that clown been in that bag?? Brrr.  Last but not least giant rooster with gawking eyes. This picture deserves a zoom in. 

I think the most frightening item at the shop today was a handmade mask. Looked like a school project gone wrong. Such things were not meant for the thriftstore. The mom who donated it should have kept it packed away in a box and burried in an attic so that future home owners would have a good scare while riffling through things left behind. Cliche horror story moment.  

Why did someone price that at $2.99??? It's so scary.

Some interesting finds at the store today. 

Here's a quick overview. 

Large glass bead pineapple???

Dog calender. I think this is actually pretty cool. They should combine it with the trivet and other dog paraphenalia and make a doggy basket with it.  

Yet another pineapple but this time made with paper. Next to it is a beautiful metal and wood box made in India. I really liked it but have no use for it. 

Mason jar wine glass!!! From Bubbagumps too!  People be swipin from the dining table. 

Last but not least... Totally cute vintage teapots. I did not bring anything home today but it sure was a fun spread. 

Daily thrifting leads to great rewards. 

Soon to come... Some of my favourite thrifted items. 

Peace out! 

A window into a spiritual journey...try to get back to the good place.

When I listen to "The Secret" or "The Power" it says to that if you give off a negative feeling it will come back at you later. Today I encountered a moment when I was triggered. There are certain situations that will set me off and rolling waves of anger, frustration and resentment will come into me. They are hard to shut off. It's like a collective of the same situation happening over and over again and even if it's a single event it feels like every similar event that has happened in the last 20 years. Needless to say I need to learn to let go of certain things. Everyone has pet peeves... So my pet peeve showed up again today and though I did not get noticeably angry when it happened and tried to remain calm and supportive I was upset inside.  The feeling wouldn't go away. I tried to just feel it. I tried to ignore it. But eventually I had to tell someone how I felt and it including blaming another in my rant.  I was not supposed to gossip anymore too! It's so hard!

Conclusion... felt a bit guilty afterwards and still did not feel better. Those thoughts still lingered. But here's where things come back...

While driving and alert (except for the constant complaining in my head) someone turned right while I was driving straight and tried to cross two lanes into the second lane in which I was driving (obviously without looking). He was going SUPER fast and nearly crashed into me. I honked soooooo hard and braked with all my might.  Luckily we did not crash into each other as he eventually swerved into the other lane. It was a really close call. I took that as the negativity coming back at me (almost instantly) and the Universe telling me to stop repeating bad stories in my head. I tried to stay conscious for the rest of the drive.

That's my story for the day. I wanted to make note of this story as evidence that my negative thinking brought about more negative circumstances to me. I hope this will keep me conscious and help me change my thinking. I really want to focus on the good, in every situation, and continue moving forward, whether there are small or big unwanted changes in life. In the past, when I was negative, it had affected more than one area of life. I learn this lesson constantly. How do I maintain that lesson when I am emotionally high? I guess I keep getting moments to practice this until I get there.

I am thinking of joining an 8 day retreat at Bohdi Meditation in the summer as I've seen it do wonders for someone I know. My friend is so inspired by the change she sees in her family and herself after joining this center and meditating with dedication. Some changes that she noted was that her son has lessened anxiety and maladaptive behaviours. After 2 months of intense medication he has been taken off his anti-psychotic meds. I have never seen him so calm. He's relaxed. Smiles more. And he voices when he's uncomfortable or needs help. My friend has experienced a change in her reactions when she is met with opposing behaviour. She doesn't react in anger anymore. She just let's go. She said it was from the meditation as well as the lessons they were receiving from the center. Sounds like a miracle really.

I've been on a spiritual journey for a while now. There are ups and downs in this journey. Some sections are high and some are low. Some days you feel like you've gotten there. You are feel super content, happier, and cheerful. Other days it's a struggle to feel inspired or connected to "life".  "Life" is that joy in experiencing situations and people. Where you heart feels open and forgiving for all things.  When you have that lack of connectedness I think your mind might find a way to wander. It looks into the past and looks for reasons why you don't feel right. Then you gotta fight that mind to stay and come back to where you are. I don't feel like myself recently. It's been hard to not absorb negativity. But I am reminding myself that during the good times it's as important to practice the gratitude and love that is more effortless than in times that are hard. Just got to be consistent.  I will work on being grateful for my life which I am.  But I will work on feeling that way more in everyday moments. I think my mind is always somewhere in the clouds... can't see that clearly right now but at least I know it.

The two life lessons I learned today

April... has come and gone. It's already May! It seems as you get older time moves faster. Maybe it's like that story... when do you start heading out of the forest?... only when you reach the center. So maybe I'm at the center of my life now and I'm on my way out. Always...make every moment count.

In the last couple of weeks I have celebrated two friend's marriages, met a distant nephew of mine, gone to the Okanagan and ate and drank lots! Life is abundant is so many ways.

I've had two life lessons that I want to share that I've discovered recently...

1) Love... is our nature. I read it all the time but reading has very little to do with actual understanding and feeling. Today I was looking at my niece and I learned something. How many times have we walked this Earth feeling unlovable, unhappy, looking for love in all the wrong places and feeling a general lack of love... for yourself, for life, for others etc etc... We are all guilty of this once in a while. But look at your history and your history is love. From the moment of conception a body sacrificed itself to nourish you out of love. The Universe loved you so much it continue your conception into birth. For the fortunate ones we were born to family that loved us unconditionally, even when we didn't deserve it and even when we didn't give it back. That means even in times when we were most unlovable, like when we had soiled diapers, cried all night, threw a tantrum, was a teenager, an angry resentful adult, or whatever it may be.... even if it looked like people didn't love you, they did. You were made from the cushion of love and blessed by love. You are what you are made of and you are made by love. No matter where we go in search of what we think love is we can be free to know it's been within us all along. We are already loved, all the time, even when we allow our minds to take over and not love ourselves. Children teach me so much.  My niece probably doesn't know how loved she is. Each time something doesn't go her way in life she might see life as an enemy for that moment but in reality it's a forgiving world that loves her no matter what. That applies to all of us. It proves we have a great ability to love ourselves if we can love others so much.

2) Second lesson I learned today came from a student of mine that was learning about "slime mold" in his biology class. He wanted me to see a video about how scientist are trying to use the behaviour of slime mold to determine the best and most efficient ways to build subway stations in big cities like Tokyo. They put some slime mold in a pitri dish and scatter bits of oatmeal all over the dish. If you watch the video you will see that from a single point the slime mold begins to branch out and find the oatmeal. What's really interesting is that the branching is not random. The slime mold knows exactly where to go and how to reach it's goal of eating oatmeal. It b-lines for the grains. Slime mold has no brain. It has no obstacles. It just lives it's life and does it's thing and it hits the jack pot every time. It's directed by the power of the Universe and not by the power of thoughts. It creates the most efficient path to it's goal just by being slime mold. If we all stop struggling and just tried to be will we reach our goal of getting to where we are meant to be? The slime mold video moment was like evidence to me that the Universe has a plan for you. It has a most efficient plan, actually, to get you where you need to be if we don't resist.  If we want food... it will get us food. If we want money... it will get us money. If we want love... it was give us love. All things we want we can have... we just have to wish it and go with the flow of life.

*** update (days later)... so I researched the slime mold further and it's process of finding food isn't accurately stated above. I do love the idea that it just knows where to go because it's guided by the Universe but it's just not so. The slime old spreads out and branches out everywhere. When it finds food it strengthens that branch allowing it to access the food in the fastest way possible. Those branches that lead out to nothing get reabsorbed and the energy used to power those branches goes to the ones that are absorbing nutrients. The slime mold can identify and create a network of nutrients efficiently within a day in a petri dish. It can get so big that the naked eye can see the branches. It's patterns are beautiful. For a brainless creature it's very intelligent. So now that I know more accurate information about the slime mold I was trying to figure out what the slime could teach us about being successful in life. It's life is simple. Get food and grow. Get food and grow. Strengthen the bonds that nurture you now. Don't put any more energy into areas once ventured that offer you nothing. This is how you grow. Slime mold is wise.

I love slime mold.