Fall ponderings.

The leaves have not changed and the weather is still reminiscent of summer. The only real change I've noticed is the mist in the morning and the dew that covers my car window in the morning. The days are still hot and muggy. Last night I went to a concert and it was still pretty warm out. We have had a long summer and I am grateful for that. Now it's Fall, and we are back to the hum drum of school life. Back to regular working hours and running around panicked in a classroom. With all the changes, I feel a difference in my mind and my body. I feel excited and tired all at the same time. I feel enthusiastic. I love the new year feeling when you get that rush that makes you think this year will be the year that our students will learn something they will carry with them for their entire lives. This will be the year. There are so many things to accomplish and the road is so long we can only imagine the finish line. But sometimes imagination is better than seeing the real thing. Imagination fuels creativity and hope. Sometimes the real thing will stop you in your tracks. So thank goodness for the illusion a new school year brings with it.

I noticed today that since I've started working again my shopping has gone up. Is this a coincidence or is this shopping therapy? Maybe I need to be more careful about this since I should be trying to save money as a life goal. The school year is when I do my New Years resolutions. It's when I feel like it's time to start a new. When I have an inkling to get a high instead of buying clothes I should go exercise which is my other life goal. I need to remember my goals. Actually I always remember them. I need to work at them. It's so easy to put them on the back burner.

Now also I am trying to ignore a situation or move on in my life and not let little things bother me. How do you do that? Do you just accept what is? That is essentially not resisting life. Be appreciative? I am. But sometimes it's very confusing where I am supposed to be. If things are right for me. If you are not sure are you just suppose to accept what you have and be appreciative?

Maybe the better thing to do is to look at this again in a few months. Not resisting also means stopping something that doesn't work. Things deserve some time however, I should not just be waiting around for the thing that is not working to disappear. Things like that don't disappear. I should also not be unreasonable with unattainable expectations.

On that note... I need to go to the doctor... one of these days I will go to the doctor... I really hate going to the doctor...another thing on the back burner. Avoidance is a great ability and can also be terrible.

Fall resolutions: Watching my spending, go to the gym, let go of something if I have to, go to the doctor... and stop putting things on the back burner.

Now it's time to go out and have a drink with the girls!